It's monday! Was talking with Beatrice all night. Well, 'she' talked to me too. a little bit. Perhaps Beatrice's right. Shared lots about her r/s, and mine. About the way it hurts. about what we should do. About what we must do.

To wait till the heart is empty again. So that the person you'll be with next will be fair. To obtain your truest love. I don't know. Perhaps I'm selfish. Or perhaps I just couldn't forget her like this. It's mission impossible. But even impossible says "i m possible". Maybe I'll need some luck plus some dose of lavander. Put myself to sleep and hypotise myself. Maybe I'll wake up forgetting all about her. Then I'll be able to love someone truefully.

Sometimes I wonder is Beatrice feeling worse or me. Maybe it's her. She's a girl after all. Guys are supposed to be stronger. But I don't know why there's this trobbing pain to the left lung. Maybe it's some lung disease. Maybe my heart's failing. So that it is not pain due to the hurt you left me.

Sometimes I still wished that I've got more luck than what I have. Maybe I've gotta do some plastic surgery to attract more women. Then I'll not be that lonely after all. But I still want someone that I love. Not just anyone. Just her. Maybe next time it'll be someone else. Someone who could give me that special feeling. Someone who'll make me sms her everyday, who'll make me do stupid things, who'll give me ammesia, whom i'll dream of every night.